It also seems that it’s impossible to “un-train” them once they’ve developed in that way, so they’re basically lost. Finding mothers to be more violent than fathers is not an uncommon discovery in average community samples, according to the researchers. "In our sample it seemed to be the 'common couple' type of violence that occurred, not the controlling and severe abuse that people think of when they think of domestic violence ," said Marni L. In Eastern Europe under communist regimes, both spouses worked outside of the home and tended to be egalitarian in decision making, but women remained primarily responsible for household work (Lapidus 1978; Elliot and Moskoff 1983).

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